On My Mind

RBF – This is just my face.

I look stuck up or angry 90% of my life.  Not in my profile pic, but, you know, in general.

Have you ever looked at me and thought “What is WRONG with her?” “I’m not asking her anything right now with that look on her face.” Even “Mindy looks PISSED.” Come on, admit it. If you know me in real life, I know you’ve thought it.

Here’s the deal though- I’ve thought the same thing aboutyou. I have taken one look at your face and came to conclusions about what you were thinking or what you were feeling or even if you LIKED me or not. Based just off your expression. Seriously.

What is RBF?

Let’s unpack this.  There’s a term for the relaxed face that looks, um, unhappy.  It’s called “RBF” for short and the B is not for Beyoncé.  RBF (or Resting Bitch Face, sorry grandma) is a term that has been tossed around for years but was made more popular around 2015 when magazines like Cosmopolitan and Elle began mentioning it in their publications.  RBF, according to Wikipedia, is a facial expression that unintentionally appears as if the person is angry, annoyed, or contemptuous, particularly when the individual is relaxed, resting or not expressing any emotion. Wowza.

Here are some things I am thinking about on the regular- and usually when my face is in full out RB mode-

My face. Just how it usually is.

“I’m hungry”

“Did I turn off the curling iron?”

“I just took a DNA test found out I’m 100% that…” (Lizzo lyric, if you know you know.  It gets stuck in my head all the time.)

“I wonder what Luke packed in his lunch today. Hope it wasn’t just four fruit by the foots”

Normal things.  I have been told, however, when I am thinking about these things it looks like I’m contemplating murder or revenge.  I’m usually not that deep or vindictive.  I don’t think you are either. If I am contemplating someone’s demise I look more like this-

The tell-tale sign y’all, is that left eye.  If it’s smaller, back up.

Me, angry. Clue : Left Eye.

All joking aside, this is a real problem in our society amongst women.  I mean, really, how often do you think a man gets told he has RBF?  The B is feminine.  The instance of the ‘disorder’ is SCIENTIFICALLY the same amongst men and women, but we are mostly the ones who deal with it. SIGH.

Be the change.

So, fellow ladies with the ‘angry eyes,’ what are we going to do about our faces?  Here’s an idea I had! How about nothing.  How about, instead, let’s just accept it.  Accept ourselves, accept others. 

What to know a sure-fire way to get me to not smile?  Suggest I smile.  Instead, smile at me.  I’ll probably do it back.  Unless, you know, the left eye is smaller.  Then you may need to just back away.  I’ll smile at you too, first, if I want a smile in return.

Even better than that, I’ll speak to you before I assume you don’t like me. I’ll ask about your day, rather than assuming you don’t want to talk. I’ll tell you a joke or offer you a cookie or something. I think we will all make more friends when we stop judging a book by it’s cover. Or in this case, a Beyoncé by her expression.

I’m smiling. All the way.

What do you think?  Do you too have RBF?  Share this blog post on Social Media and let’s spread awareness.  Maybe we need a ribbon or a special bracelet to identify the cause….

Like the post if you liked the content or even better leave a comment!  You’re reactions make my RBF melt into a smile.

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One thought on “RBF – This is just my face.

  1. I’m guilty of it too. My kids ask me all the time “what’s wrong “? Usually I’m just deep in thought but sometimes I am a little tired or stressed. But I can see when it’s affecting the mood around me and try to perk up. But sometimes it’s just my face so deal with it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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